Tag Archives: philosophy

A Lesson in Gratitude

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Dear Q,

We live in a consumer-driven world that will tell you that you need to want whatever you don’t have – from cars, to razors, to body parts.  This constant wanting prevents you from appreciating what you have and recognizing the abundance that surrounds you.  We are conditioned to complain – about the weather, about the economy, about work, about school, about other people.  In the summer, the weather is too hot.  In the winter, it’s too cold. Resist.

Abundance is a matter of perception.  Appreciate what you have.  When it rains, lift your face to the sky and be grateful that you are not living in drought.  Water is life and it is falling from the sky.  For free!  If you look at rain as an inconvenience, that is what it will become.  Concentrate on what you have and more will come to you.  Once you start to recognize the abundance around you, you will see just how much you have to be grateful for.

You are surrounded by abundance – of love, of nature, of laughter, of music, of art, of life… be grateful for it.

Love always,

Mom

A Lesson in Taking it Personally

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Dear Q,

Don’t take anything personally.  When people call you names (and they will), ignore them.  Remember that nothing people say to you or about you is ever actually about you.  It is ALWAYS about them.  Everything that people say is about them.  Insults are reflections of insecurities.  People will try to make themselves feel better by making you feel bad.  Don’t fall for it and don’t give them power over your emotions or feelings of self-worth.

This goes for you, too.  Remember that every insult you hurl at another person is rooted in your own insecurities; it is a reflection of who you are at that given moment.  Check your self.  Be conscious of what you say and why you are saying it.  Is it kind?  Is it just?  Is it necessary?

Love always,
Mom

A Lesson in Confidence

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Dear Q,

Remember that no one, no body, and no thing is more worthy, more brilliant, or closer to perfection than you are.  As much as this world will try to convince you that you are inferior and need to better your self, your body, your image, or your mind to ‘measure up,’ remember that there is no hierarchy of being.  No single human is superior to you.  No celebrity. No president. No teacher.  No parent. No boss.  No athlete.  No one is superior to you.  Never doubt your ability and never second guess your capacity to contribute.

Having said that, remember your lesson on ego.  There is a fine line between confidence and arrogance.  It is possible to be confident and humble.  Believe in your self, but do not feel the need to convince others of your worth.  Check your ego and check your motives.  You can never truly lift your self up by stomping on others because, chances are, they will buckle and give way beneath you.

No one, no body, and no thing is more worthy than you are.  And, you are no more worthy than any one, any body, or any thing.

Love always,

Mom

A Lesson in spending

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Dear Q,

I will be the first to tell you that we give more power to money than it deserves.  Money is not worth anything; it is just paper or coin.  What it symbolizes is powerful, and in our increasingly cashless culture, money maintains it’s power even if doesn’t exist in a physical sense.  The meaning we attribute to money is arbitrary, yet it rules the world.  And, we let it.

As much as the concepts of money, ownership, and capitalism conflict with what I know to be true, to live in this world, I have to understand them.

We live in a culture that is ruled by credit.  Never spend more than you have in an effort to impress people you don’t know, or don’t like.  Remember your lesson on ego, and before you make a purchase, ask yourself why you desire it.  Is it kind? Is it necessary?  Is it true?  If you have doubts, then don’t spend – even if it’s only for a coffee.

Whether you have money or not, don’t let it rule your life; the more you focus on it, the more it will consume you and define your life.  Remember, you may need money to live, but you never need it to be.

Love always,

Mom

defining god, or God

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The other day, someone accused me of being an atheist. And, I say accused not because I feel that being an Atheist is undesirable, but because the comment felt like an accusation.

My curious nature, and reluctance to accept an unfitting label (or any label, for that matter), encouraged me to research the word further. After exploring its etymology and definitions, I discovered that the literal meaning of the word atheist is godless. It seems like a fair assessment.

Still, I am reluctant to accept it without fully exploring the term god.

After reviewing the definitions of god, not only did I lose all faith in my source, I discovered that the overriding themes were an omnipotent supreme being, or one who is worshiped. Undoubtedly, by definition, I am an atheist.

But if I am an atheist, how do I define what I believe? Surely, being godless does not mean I am void of any belief system. I believe in something, but it’s not a being, and it’s not omnipotent, and I don’t worship it; so, can it not be a god?

Despite what dictionary.com says, I believe that there are as many definitions of god as there are people. Maybe god is simply whatever we want it to be.

To me, God is not a supreme being; god is being, supremely.

A Lesson in Balance

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Dear Q,

I believe that as your mother, it is my job to prepare you for this world, and this world is crazy! In order to thrive in it while maintaining some semblance of sanity, everything has to be in balance: mind, body, spirit, emotions. As soon as anything is off, you will lose perspective of your being.

Physical health without mental, emotional, or spiritual health is pointless. Remember, your body is a reflection of your being, but it is not who your are; it is only temporary. Learn as much as you can. Seek answers. Cry when you need to cry. Laugh a lot. Do as much as you want to, but always be.

It is also important to balance your personal life with your professional life. This world will tempt you to emphasize your professional life, make more money, and consume more. Resist temptation. At the end of your life, you will never, ever wish you had worked more hours. Don’t neglect your personal life, for that is what will fill your heart and let you be.

Love always,

Mom

A Lesson on ego

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Dear Q,

My mother always said “don’t cut off your nose to spite your face.” Once I figured out what it meant, I appreciated the wisdom. Spitefulness, in any case, is the work of your ego. It always needs to be right, to be better, or look better, or do better; it’s usually at the expense of relationships, but it’s always at the expense of your spiritual well-being.

Keep your ego in check. It is really easy to buy into this “buy me” world that we humans have created. This consumer-driven world can cater to your ego if you let it. In my experience, a let it be attitude is much easier to live by than a look at me attitude. As the world is telling you to consume and you find yourself wanting to (and you will), ask yourself why.

Why do you want the big screen TV, the fancy car, or the big house? What part of you really wants it? It’s your ego; it’s the part of you that gets stroked whenever someone looks longingly at it. Your ego will relish the thought that you might appear better or richer or more worthy. Resist it. The more you feed your ego, the more it grows.

It is really easy to let your ego get the better of you – to let it make your decisions and dictate your interactions and relationships. Trust me, it is not worth it. Don’t let yourself get in your own way.

Love,

Mom