Comments for s a r a h c a s m

Comment on Throwdown by Kate

Kate — Sun, 25 Jul 2010 01:41:00 +0000

I think finding safe ways to explore throwing is good. We have a few stuffed balls and a couple inflated ones for in house play. Even outside, we didn’t throw hard things with my first. I remember conversations like this: we don’t throw rocks. You may drop the rock. Rocks stay on the ground….

Discipline is so tough with kids. You know better then anyone what your son cares about, what impacts him. You will know what will help him learn to control himself. When my daughter was just three, a teacher told a classmate of her’s, “you make a choice, stop doing XYZ or I will have to ABC (the specifics don’t matter). Remember, I cant control your body. You control your body.” How often do we remind our kids that they have power to change things? Especially positively?

Which reminds me — for my girl, it’s all about praise. If I want a behavior changed, I have to catch her doing it right and praise praise praise her. Sometimes I catch her just before she starts doing something forbidden and say wow, good job for stopping yourself before you hit your sister. I am so proud of you.
That got long. Sorry.

Comment on Throwdown by Nannidale

Nannidale — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 16:14:44 +0000

I think Colin’s on the right track. (Aren’t brothers great!) If you take him outside to play catch, he might start picking up balls and saying, “Frow ball outside.”

It would be good exercise for you, too, considering the arm he’s got on him. Maybe you should dig out your old baseball glove!

Yup, I think playing catch would work. As long as he doesn’t start picking up balls and saying, “Frow ball at Mommy!” lol

Comment on Throwdown by ShannonL

ShannonL — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 12:42:49 +0000

There’s that little baseball slugger showing off his skills again! LOL! I know, not funny when it’s food or in the car, etc.

I agree with Colin and others that Q should have some ‘throwing time’. Try to teach him that throwing is only with balls (or only outside) – like an indoor/outdoor voice rule. Then give him that time to do it. Maybe he will blow off enough steam that way.

Good luck!

Comment on Throwdown by Kooky

Kooky — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 04:52:14 +0000

I don’t have time to read the other replies so I apologise if this repeats what others have said.

I’d encourage the throwing behaviour but in a way that is acceptable to you. Start by making throwing an outside game. Go outside and play throw & catch every 30 minutes. Get lots of different types of things he can throw (balls, bean bags etc) and receptacles for him to chuck them in to, (boxes, baskets, hoops, buckets). Every time he throws inappropriately take him out doors and let him fling to his hearts content. Eventually he’ll either tire of it or atleast he’s doing it in a controlled fashion. Plus he’ll develop great hand-eye co-ordination!

WRT the food throwing, I be tempted to just give him one food item at a time. I mean one slice of apple or one chip etc. If it gets eaten then great, give another. If it gets thrown then the meal is over for 30 minutes. Repeat.

Neither of these are quick fixes but if you do them calmly and consistently I reckon you’ll see a change.

Good luck. I have two climbers which is a whole new set of problems, I’m sure half their genes are monkey!

Comment on Throwdown by Sarah Carmichael

Sarah Carmichael — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 03:28:52 +0000

I have had Q clean it up, but I`ve discovered that he likes to clean it. Today, I cleaned it while he was in a T/O and it bothered him. He even said “Mommy, I wanna clean!” That might be an angle to explore…

Comment on Throwdown by Sarah Carmichael

Sarah Carmichael — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 02:18:36 +0000

Yes, reaction. As time goes on, I have become less and less patient with him. If I appear unfazed and just take away the toy without saying anything, that might have more impact… good point. Thanks, LZ!

Comment on Throwdown by Sarah Carmichael

Sarah Carmichael — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 02:17:02 +0000

Not a crap answer! It’s good to know I am not alone and that he’s not the only one. Annoying and frustrating as it is, knowing that it comes with his age is a comfort.

Comment on Throwdown by Sarah Carmichael

Sarah Carmichael — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 02:06:54 +0000

I really appreciate your perspective, Karen!

I think you’re right. I don’t think he grasps the cause and effect re: consequences. That is one of the reasons I struggle with it.

I try to empower him as much as I can – respecting him as a person and guiding him through his life while keeping in mind his stage of development and limitations as a result of his inexperience. It’s a tough balance.

Comment on Throwdown by Lisa

Lisa — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 01:56:10 +0000

I like the suggestions of encouraging him to throw things that are safe (as per Pauline) and a designated time to throw (as per Colin). When L does throw things that are not acceptable things to throw we direct him back to the ones that are. He has a few balls that are meant only for rolling in the house and he accepts that, forgets sometimes, but it just takes reminding and he is good.
As for the throwing of food, I agree with the few suggestions that you take away for a few mins, give it back if it happens again no more dinner. One meal now and again won’t hurt. We’ve done that as well with Liam when he is being naughty at the table. If he is hungry later he gets the rest of that meal, but he will not get anything other than that. We’ve only done it a few times and so far it has worked. He doesn’t throw his food, but he ocassionaly acts out at the table, so this has been our solution. One or two times doing that and showing him you mean business about the food throwing may solve that issue. I don’t know….

Comment on Throwdown by Sarah Carmichael

Sarah Carmichael — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 01:47:36 +0000

Good idea! Maybe instead of discouraging from throwing anything and everything, we should encourage him to throw harmless things instead.

Thanks for your perspective, Pauline!