Comments on: But, why?

By: LZ

LZ — Wed, 05 May 2010 15:15:05 +0000

I get so frustrated when I’m told ‘how’ but not ‘why.’ I often worry about people who just take ‘how’ advice at face value, instead of asking ‘why’ they’re doing it, or if they could do it better.
Well said

By: Sarah Carmichael

Sarah Carmichael — Wed, 05 May 2010 14:24:32 +0000

Welcome, Jamie! I am so glad you stopped by and took the time to read and comment.

By: Jamie

Jamie — Wed, 05 May 2010 14:16:32 +0000

Hi Sarah – this is such a great question, one I’ve truly never considered before. I parent because I feel that my son is the greatest blessing of my life. It’s easy to forget when he’s driving me crazy being a typical 3 year old, but when I stop to think of it, I am honestly awed by the privilege of being his mother. I parent because I feel I have to do my very best to help him realize all his talents and potential (whatever those may be) so that he can make a contribution to this world. I parent because I believe that teaching him values like integrity, kindness, and respect for himself and others can go a long way towards making the world a better place.

Thank you for such a thought-provoking post, and thank you for your comment on my blog that led me here!

By: Sarah Carmichael

Sarah Carmichael — Wed, 05 May 2010 13:35:29 +0000

I am so glad yout stopped by, Rebecca! My son has just started asking ‘why’ – makes me stop and think and figure it out sometimes.

You’re right – why is complex – we are so good at complicating things!

By: Sarah Carmichael

Sarah Carmichael — Wed, 05 May 2010 13:33:27 +0000

Thanks, Maureen!

By: Maureen

Maureen — Wed, 05 May 2010 13:26:32 +0000

What a great post! I love it and I’m thinking of a my answer to your question. I think I parent my son because God has trusted me enough to raise this small little person and to help him grow up to be a much better person than his Mommy but in the process he ended up teach me a lot of things too so it’s a two way streets. He taught me to sit back and relax and live in the moment, to savor the little things me as a going going mommy sometimes forget. Great post, Sarah I totally love it!

By: Rebecca

Rebecca — Wed, 05 May 2010 02:47:45 +0000

Hi there stopping by from SITS. Loved reading your post here. The How WILL follow, you are correct. Why is such a crazy complex question when it comes from an adult rather than a two year old. I have a two year and a half year old and I only wish my brain worked as simply as hers. All well.
Anyway on the topic of Motherhood, I have a fun little Q & A on my blog. Stop on by and if you want link up. The link will be open all week. It’s been fun getting to know other moms this way. Cheers to Motherhood and Have a happy Mother’s day in case you don’t come by
Rebecca @
The Blessings of Modern Domestication

By: Sarah Carmichael

Sarah Carmichael — Tue, 04 May 2010 17:46:32 +0000

Not convoluted. I hear what your are saying and I agree. I don’t parent by a clock, though. Q makes his needs known to me – by rubbing his eyes, getting crabby, crying for no apparent reason – all those things tell me that he’s tired. Sometimes, it’s a little after his usual naptime and sometimes it is before. I discovered that once I started paying attn to his cues and signs and listening to his needs, he became more and more predictable. I could almost set a clock by his sleeping patterns. The less I tried to impose on him, the more routine he developed on his own.

He needs guidance and guidelines. Putting him to bed when he’s tired is in his best interest (even if he doesn’t think so at the time). I have to keep him safe and set boundaries about things he doesn’t understand. But in so doing, I have to remember that he needs to make the decisions that he is capable of – and that at his age, he has no concept of clock time and neither does his body.

By: ShannonL

ShannonL — Tue, 04 May 2010 17:31:21 +0000

I love this. Yes, as parents we do tend to dwell on the how instead of the why. It’s important to remember that if we figure out the why first, the how will most likely come naturally. Thanks for this!

By: Erin

Erin — Tue, 04 May 2010 16:40:10 +0000

This is such a touching POV. I’m not yet a parent, but I often think about all the good my baby will do in and for my life once s/he arrives, and how much I have to learn from him/her.